Well.. It is so cloudy and rainy, it feels like Summertime in Alaska. Which I love!! When I'm IN Alaska.
I'm not a person that loves the heat and sun- for obvious, Fair Skinned-blue eyed, Red haired reasons.. Yet, It is June, by last glance at the calendar, and I would really like to order a warm sunny pre-summer day, Please.
In other important news.. I actually had the steri-strips taken off by my fabulous Surgeon, Dr Doshi, and I was surprised at the beauty in the scar.
Every Scar we have is a visual reminder of fences scaled, rocks tripped over, or hardships endured. In my younger days, I would have been so self conscious about a scar about 3-4 inches long in the middle of my neck. But I welcome the stares, I welcome the inquires.
It is an opportunity, to prove by first glance that I am a Survivor.
The numerous conversations I have been blessed with because of this scar, and previous bandages, have offered me Hope, and I Hope- some Hope was exchanged in the brief revealing of my Journey.
I was listening to Pastor James McDonald on Moody Radio- Walk In The Word, and I love it when I get in the car, and the topic just grabs me, and I can say, ' Ok.. God.. You have my attention, because I know this is what I need to hear.'
Today was a wonderful affirmation of each day, sometimes each hour- The importance of being in the Word, and Choosing to Believe what it says, despite my circumstances.
As you may guess, I am Human. We all are. Even though, I have Faith- There are times, moments, and days, I can trail off into the land of ME, and find myself in doubt, anxiety, and even fear. Fear has ruled far too many of my moments in the process of testing, surgical consults, pre surgery testing, Waiting in the Pre-Op wing to go downstairs.. well, um.. you get the picture.
It was interesting to me, how much of our walk is on the beam of the In-Between. Where our heart and mind knows the truth, yet- we still get upset when someone cuts us off while driving, or we choose to give credence to worry, and negativity far too quickly.
The key word is Choose.
You can actually go to http://www.walkintheword.com/ and listen to mp3's, get Cd's of the sermons.
The one that hit me was the June 11th Thursday - FREE FROM FEAR Part 3. I believe.
' When God is Magnified- Fear is Gone...' I'm here to testify.. God has me firmly in the palm of His hands, and my Hands are reaching out to Him on a daily basis.. sometimes Hour by hour..
It is a choice.
When I get another bill as I just opened my bank statement- My mind knows what I do not have, but I pray for time and clarity, to truly sift thru my finances and seek ways to cut corners in this season. I don't pray for the bills to go away. Although that would be wonderful..
When I hear ill spoken words, or speak them myself, or I choose to admit my weaknesses, and make amends, and be convicted by God- to not only cut off the wart, but everything in the gland.. so that I can have a lighter heart and not let redundant, meaningless things get to me and make my soul toxic.. AND believe He will do it.
When I realise I'm getting closer to Radiation, as I attempt to sing, or even talk in general and am not able to be heard like I was 3 weeks ago- I choose to reach up and out my Hearts Hand or my literal hand - in my car, my home, in the middle of Panera Bread, or while taking out the Garbage- To the One who is working in me to heal me.
Maybe not the way I would want, or At the pace I would desire. But I have seen and felt His Presence while I was in the Surgeon's office. I felt His presence wash over me, and all priorities of my keeping my singing/speaking voice, and fear of surgery, and all that goes along with that...
yeah.. They just went out the door, window, and my importantly my heart.
The Surgeons door opened, not by my choosing... but I opened my heart to the possibility of help, and gave
my situation over to the Divine Healer--- HE MOVES MIGHTILY.... don't know if that is a word, but it so fits.
HE MOVES MIGHTILY!!!
He did, and I have Faith that He will continue to be present amidst my circumstances. And yours too. For this blog is about me.. but I'm aware that as eyes may read.. I say this as a witness, This is Truth for you to freely adhere to your situations.
My life/body/being... is getting bumped on the sides like a wayward bowling ball leaving the hands of a child bashing into the neon gutter bumpers as I achieve more balance to stay on task and focus on the Lord...and align my heart with God.
I'm being called to draw nearer to being near.
'When Your Walking with the Lord in Faith..... Faith and Fear cannot Co-Exist.' Pastor James
My Verse of the moment that is, at the core.. My Hearts Song...
' I WILL SING UNTO THE LORD, FOR HE HAS TRIUMPHED GLORIOUSLY ' Exodus 15:1
Triumphed over Many dates and situations of late.. and Especially over this day. This tiredness I feel.. and almost gave into- To Put off sharing what is on my heart.
Love Ya'll,
Julie
Exodus 15:2 " The Lord is My Strength, My Song..."
I'm not a person that loves the heat and sun- for obvious, Fair Skinned-blue eyed, Red haired reasons.. Yet, It is June, by last glance at the calendar, and I would really like to order a warm sunny pre-summer day, Please.
In other important news.. I actually had the steri-strips taken off by my fabulous Surgeon, Dr Doshi, and I was surprised at the beauty in the scar.
Every Scar we have is a visual reminder of fences scaled, rocks tripped over, or hardships endured. In my younger days, I would have been so self conscious about a scar about 3-4 inches long in the middle of my neck. But I welcome the stares, I welcome the inquires.
It is an opportunity, to prove by first glance that I am a Survivor.
The numerous conversations I have been blessed with because of this scar, and previous bandages, have offered me Hope, and I Hope- some Hope was exchanged in the brief revealing of my Journey.
I was listening to Pastor James McDonald on Moody Radio- Walk In The Word, and I love it when I get in the car, and the topic just grabs me, and I can say, ' Ok.. God.. You have my attention, because I know this is what I need to hear.'
Today was a wonderful affirmation of each day, sometimes each hour- The importance of being in the Word, and Choosing to Believe what it says, despite my circumstances.
As you may guess, I am Human. We all are. Even though, I have Faith- There are times, moments, and days, I can trail off into the land of ME, and find myself in doubt, anxiety, and even fear. Fear has ruled far too many of my moments in the process of testing, surgical consults, pre surgery testing, Waiting in the Pre-Op wing to go downstairs.. well, um.. you get the picture.
It was interesting to me, how much of our walk is on the beam of the In-Between. Where our heart and mind knows the truth, yet- we still get upset when someone cuts us off while driving, or we choose to give credence to worry, and negativity far too quickly.
The key word is Choose.
You can actually go to http://www.walkintheword.com/ and listen to mp3's, get Cd's of the sermons.
The one that hit me was the June 11th Thursday - FREE FROM FEAR Part 3. I believe.
' When God is Magnified- Fear is Gone...' I'm here to testify.. God has me firmly in the palm of His hands, and my Hands are reaching out to Him on a daily basis.. sometimes Hour by hour..
It is a choice.
When I get another bill as I just opened my bank statement- My mind knows what I do not have, but I pray for time and clarity, to truly sift thru my finances and seek ways to cut corners in this season. I don't pray for the bills to go away. Although that would be wonderful..
When I hear ill spoken words, or speak them myself, or I choose to admit my weaknesses, and make amends, and be convicted by God- to not only cut off the wart, but everything in the gland.. so that I can have a lighter heart and not let redundant, meaningless things get to me and make my soul toxic.. AND believe He will do it.
When I realise I'm getting closer to Radiation, as I attempt to sing, or even talk in general and am not able to be heard like I was 3 weeks ago- I choose to reach up and out my Hearts Hand or my literal hand - in my car, my home, in the middle of Panera Bread, or while taking out the Garbage- To the One who is working in me to heal me.
Maybe not the way I would want, or At the pace I would desire. But I have seen and felt His Presence while I was in the Surgeon's office. I felt His presence wash over me, and all priorities of my keeping my singing/speaking voice, and fear of surgery, and all that goes along with that...
yeah.. They just went out the door, window, and my importantly my heart.
The Surgeons door opened, not by my choosing... but I opened my heart to the possibility of help, and gave
my situation over to the Divine Healer--- HE MOVES MIGHTILY.... don't know if that is a word, but it so fits.
HE MOVES MIGHTILY!!!
He did, and I have Faith that He will continue to be present amidst my circumstances. And yours too. For this blog is about me.. but I'm aware that as eyes may read.. I say this as a witness, This is Truth for you to freely adhere to your situations.
My life/body/being... is getting bumped on the sides like a wayward bowling ball leaving the hands of a child bashing into the neon gutter bumpers as I achieve more balance to stay on task and focus on the Lord...and align my heart with God.
I'm being called to draw nearer to being near.
'When Your Walking with the Lord in Faith..... Faith and Fear cannot Co-Exist.' Pastor James
My Verse of the moment that is, at the core.. My Hearts Song...
' I WILL SING UNTO THE LORD, FOR HE HAS TRIUMPHED GLORIOUSLY ' Exodus 15:1
Triumphed over Many dates and situations of late.. and Especially over this day. This tiredness I feel.. and almost gave into- To Put off sharing what is on my heart.
Love Ya'll,
Julie
Exodus 15:2 " The Lord is My Strength, My Song..."
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thank you for your comment(s). Please keep in mind, this Blog is not intended to take the place of solid medical advice that can only provided by a medical professional. I am not a medical professional.
Yet, I hope you find encouragement in the dialogue, and peace in what ever path you and your Medical team choose.